Before I became a certified Trauma Release Practioner and Emotions Maven, life felt very different from how it does now....
Dissatisfied. Disappointed. Lost. Sad. Frustrated. Fed up. Overstretched. Unfulfilled. Wanting to be rescued.
These are just some of the emotions I was feeling a little over 4 years ago.
Hard to imagine it now but that was where I was at. For valid reasons; my experiences, my dead-end job, my feelings about myself, the challenges I faced – in other words - my ‘stuff’.
And I’ll add another:
Guilt that I was not being the mum that I wanted to be or the mum I knew I could be. Not a bad mum by any stretch but also not one who was able to be at full capacity – either because I was a bit jaded (from the wine the night before), I was a bit tired (of life) and I was a bit overwhelmed (by everything).
Some days I’d vent at my partner. Some days I’d snap at my son. But most days, I just got on with it.
Until I couldn’t.
After a particularly bad anxiety dream I made the conscious decision to do things differently – to do me differently.
And everything changed.
Here are 4 things I truly believe:
Happiness is an inside job - for everyone, regardless of age.
And this can be learned
Teens need to feel seen, heard & understood.
To do this we need to see, hear & understand ourselves
All emotions drive behaviour.
Understand the emotions and you'll understand the behaviour
The best 'expert' for a child's wellbeing is a fully-informed & compassionate parent. No-one does it better
Inspired. Fulfilled. Empowered. Engaged. Happy. Excited. Appreciative. Calm. Safe. My own best friend.
My relationships are 100% better, my communication with others is honest & genuine (no more people-pleasing) and things feel possible (no more being in victim-mode). I have a career I love. I feel proud of the family and friends I have achieved. I feel proud of me.
Does this make me a ‘better’ mum?
You bet it does.
And way more able to cope with all the challenges of raising a teen.
The attitude you have as a parent is what your kids will learn from.
They don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are